12 Elements of a healthy relationship
One of the crucial needs of every man is a healthy relationship because it hanged the fulfillment of every other aspect of life, and anything contrary to this will directly or indirectly affect other areas of his life. The link is so vital in life because none of us have all it takes in terms of skills, talents, abilities, resources, etc. to live a life entirely independently alone.
Are you having difficulties building a healthy relationship? Don’t worry; there’s help coming your way through this article. Pay due attention to the elements of creating a healthy relationship I shall be discussing in this article, and your involvement in this year 2019 will be ten times better.
12 Crucial Elements of a healthy relationship
- Reaching out to others.
Quite some people want to establish relationships with others, but they are not willing to reach out. They are not willing to extend themselves. And there can’t be a relationship until you are ready to stretch yourself and make an effort to build it.
No relationship happened by default. Until both parties determined to commit to building the relationship, nothing happens.
Every healthy relationship is a two-way street, and both parties must be committed to reaching out.
- Enjoy each other.
Noting makes life boring better than being in a relationship with someone you don’t enjoy being together with. That is the principal reason behind many broken homes today- they never for once enjoyed their spouses. And whatever you don’t enjoy, you can’t appreciate it.
Never underestimate the value of having fun together- with your friends, spouses, children… Having fun and laughing together are signs of a healthy relationship.
How long has it been since you’ve had a good laugh with your spouse, friends, or your family?
- be Loyal to each other.
In a healthy relationship, you must be loyal to each other. There can be no friendship without this element. You can’t be a true friend if you don’t know how to be faithful.
Loyalty is one quality of a faithful person. A loyal friend is dependable- someone you can trust and count upon. And trust is a vital part of any relationship
Do your family members and friends have confidence in you? Are you so loyal that someone can tell you a thing, and that is as far as it goes? If you’re going to have a successful relationship, when someone tells you something in confidence, it should go no further. Your ability to keep faith is a mark of your loyalty.
- Available to each other.
Do you maintain your relationships with the motto “Out of sight, out of mind”?In other words, as long as your friends are in sight, you have a relationship with them, but when your friends aren’t around, you don’t ever think about them.
Being available in your relationships involves being there when you’re needed.
When your spouse or friends needs you the most, are you always available?
- Trusting each other.
Trust has to be earned, and it takes time to make it. That’s why building a healthy relationship takes time.
Houses aren’t built in a day, and neither are healthy relationships. You can’t just say ” House be built,” and have it only appear for you to live in. Similarly, you can’t go out one day and say, “I have a relationship with So-and-so” and expect to have a meaningful relationship with that person. No, lasting relationships are built over some time.
George Eliot, a Victorian writer and liberal free-thinker, once said, “No soul is desolate as long as there is a human being for whom it can feel trust and reference.”
If you’ve ever had your trust broken by someone, you’ve probably felt alone and deserted.
We need to be the kind of friends that people can trust.
Can your fiance or spouse trust you? When you said you’re going to do a thing, can people trust you to get it done? I usually encourage the younger people planning to venture into a marital relationship never to go into a relationship with someone they cannot trust.
By the nature of my ministry, I do embark on so many traveling, but even when I’m not around, my wife has nothing to fear about no matter the duration and distance, and the same thing with me. And that is only made possible because we have been able to develop trust in each other.
- The sixth element of building a healthy relationship is showing interest.
You can’t have a relationship unless you are genuinely interested in each other.
If you want to establish a relationship with another person, instead of trying to get that person interested in you, become involved in him or her! ( That piece of advice may help some singles!).
Sometimes the best thing we can do for another person is to give that person our undivided attention. All of us have to work at providing our full care because we are so busy. Sometimes when people talk to us, we don’t hear what they are saying because we are busy thinking about something else. We are not interested in listening to them.
Are you genuinely interested in other people? Taking a keen interest in other people is one way to build and maintain a relationship. And when you show interest, you’ll reap the reward of having people take an interest in you.
- Open with each other
The seventh elements require that you are open with each other. Having a meaningful relationship with someone requires taking a risk. You can’t have a good relationship if you are not accessible. And be open to someone means you may be vulnerable to him or her as well. There is a degree of vulnerability in every good relationship you begin, but it’s worth the risk.
If you are going to have a genuine relationship, you have to be real; you have to be true. There can be no facades or hypocrisy in the link if it is to succeed. One of the reasons several relationships died by the wayside was that they were established on the foundation of lies and deception. It is better you opened up and give your partner the choice of accepting you the way you are than pretending to be who you are not.
Establishing a relationship on falsehood breaks the cord of trust. And once trust is gone, then the association is on its way to collapse.
Never put up a false front when trying to establish a relationship. It doesn’t work.
Cicero said, “friendship by its nature admits of no feigning, no pretense: as far as it goes, it is both genuine and spontaneous.” We must learn to be real and open with ourselves.
- Needing each other.
John Donne, a British metaphysical poet, said that no man is an island. That means no one is complete in himself. We all need each other.
We need each other to get the work done. And we need relationships that are trustworthy and dependable.
Mother Teresa once said, ” What I can do, you cannot. What you can do, I cannot. But together, we can do something beautiful for the Lord.
- Supporting each other.
We need to support whoever we claimed to be having a relationship with. And we also need their support when we are facing a negative situation. We are to help each other in times of trouble, and we are to help each other succeed.
Over-dependence kills a relationship. Many people in a relationship are like a parasite on their partners. All they know how to do is making a request, without bringing anything to the table that could also profit their partners.
Your partner is not your ATM. As he is responsible for you, so you are to him.
- Helping each other
Everyone will need someone else to help at one time or another. Sometimes we do kind deeds for people because we want something in return. We need to help people who aren’t able to reciprocate your kindness.
Your help must be rendered without any string attached. Selfless support promotes healthy relationships, while selfishness hurts and eventually kills people’s confidence in us.
- Investing in each other
It’s been said, “Friendships are like a bank account. You cannot continue to withdraw on it without making deposits”.
If we must experience a healthy relationship, we are going to have to spend time investing in each other.
- Praying for each other.
The place of sincere fervent prayers in building a healthy relationship cannot be overemphasized. Several forces are contending against your relationship from working out, so you need to always watch over each other in prayers. That’s why you must be sure your relationship is firmly rooted in Christ Jesus alone.
But at this point, I want you to pause a little bit. Let me ask you this simple question, and I want you also to be sincere in your response: What gives you the assurance that Jesus Christ will answer your prayers on behave of your partner? There is something in our lives that hindered God from attending to our prayers. And that thing I called SIN.
God detests the prayers of sinners. That is why He made Jesus Christ sacrifice for our sins, and through Him alone, we can access forgiveness for our sins.
Have you experienced the love of Jesus Christ for your life? If not why do so right now? Do you need help in doing this? I’ll be glad to help you.
Thank you for reading my 12 elements of a healthy relationship. If you have a problem in your relationship or find it difficult to start one, please contact me, and I’ll be more than willing to offer you help.